It's Christmastime Again!

♫ Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas, couldn't miss this one this year! ♫

It's December, the windows are frosty, I've got my thick socks on, and people are getting bitchy as hell. That can only mean one thing: the holidays are in full swing! For the first time in several years I'm actually full of Yuletide joy and feeling jolly! Things are going great in This New Chapter© (as I guess I'm now calling it until I think of something hare-brained and exciting to call it).

I often feel that Christmas has a very real, very literal magic that fills the air once a year, a powerful tsunami of light in the midst of a dark wintery ocean. Imagine that you're out in the middle of the Bering Sea at night in the middle of December. It's icy cold, the wind ripping away the heat from your breath before you've barely had time to exhale. The gloomy clouds are invisible; you only know they are there because they block out the choir of stars that normally sing across the sky when you're that far away from the artificial lights of the cities. Nothing but hostile, shadowy emptiness all around you.

Then, in the distance, you see a blip on the horizon. Something is sparkling, with warm yellows, and shiny whites, and electrifying blues, and invigorating greens, and flowering pinks. It grows wider, though not much taller. You call for your shipmates to come out on deck to watch. The lights are alive, moving and prancing around each other. It stretches out even wider, and begins to gain some height. Everyone is watching in awe and curiosity. The light begins to shimmer with patterns, as if the entire field of light is talking to itself. Now it isn't on the horizon, it is the horizon. 

You all watch in awe as you realize it's a living, vibrating tsunami of rainbow lights! As it gets closer, the light begins to touch everything, and you, and your shipmates, and the ship, and the water, even the clouds above are now glowing softly with the reflection of the lights below. Every single color of light then rushes over you, and for one minute, you are no longer on the sea. You are in a galaxy. You can see everything in a new light, and everyone is filled with joy and excitement. Lights scatter around you like raindrops, zooming through the air like living fireworks. In that minute, nothing else can touch the power of the light tsunami, nothing can separate you from the joy that it brings. 

As quickly as it came, it speeds away, taking the iridescence and magic with it. But you know that sooner or later it's going to come back again. And you notice that one teeny, tiny light was left behind in your shirt pocket, right next to your heart. And you keep that light alive for another year until the lights come back again. And sometimes, that little light keeps you alive until the lights come back again.

For me, that's what Christmas feels like. It carries a special magic that is simultaneously fleeting and unmoving, a brief window of unbridled happiness and generosity that pours out on anyone willing to cup their hands and drink from it. I haven't been able to get myself into the holiday spirit for a long time, but this year I feel like the spirit of Christmas is living inside of me and blending itself with my body and soul. I truly feel so much joy and happiness this year!

I've been doing holiday baking, and decorating, and singing, and learning Christmas carols on my harp and strumstick, and picking out the perfect gifts for people. I'm finally well enough to reach up my hands to the magical winter aurora and touch the glow of good cheer and glad tidings. Not that it's been 100% holly jolly, but the holidays rarely are. For every (metaphorical) cold draft sneaking through the windows jumping up my pajamas, it's been canceled out with a (literal) cookie and warm cup of tea. And speaking of pajamas, I found a good use for my new Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer jammies!

I've revived my old tradition of doing a fun self-portrait for the holidays. Seeing as I'm still getting my plane in the air so to speak, I kept it simple this year. Between relearning how to edit photos, relearning how to use the camera, relearning how to set up lighting, and figuring out how to put everything up in a tiny area between my bed and a pile of unwrapped gifts, I was just happy to get at least one usable picture. I was also reminded how incredibly difficult it is for me to make images that aren't weird and spooky! I feel like a fish out of water trying to make normal, happy art. That's ok though, just one more thing to learn in This New Chapter©. 

Hopefully I can keep this energy up all month and I won't be bah-humbugged out by the time Christmas Day rolls around, but I'm going all in this year regardless. Particularly excited to bust out my Rankin Bass DVD collection and watch some of the classics!

I hope your holiday season is off to a good start as well, and that you can see the glittering lights beginning on the horizon in the dark sea of winter. If you're going through some hard times this year, I hope I can be one of those colorful lights racing towards you to bring you a brief moment of awe and happiness. Together, when we let the living spirit of Christmas flow through us, we can all become the light tsunami and send a brilliant galaxy of light across the ocean.

Here's to a bright and merry holiday season!